Thay on happiness

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBerK-wfxWo

Making a Joyful Effort - Christina Feldman

Christina Feldman

https://www.buddhistinquiry.org/article/making-a-joyful-effort/

"How is our mind shaping our participation in life?" ~ Shelly Graf

...being able to lean into the power of choice, and recognizing our powerlessness when facing our craving. ~ Christina Feldman

Near & Far Enemies of the Brahmaviharas

Live Session Summary, Sunday, November 26, 2023: It was good to be with you for our Live session today. The theme of the session was the ‘near and far enemies’ of loving-kindness and the other heart practices—with the focus on the ‘near enemies.’

Here are some of the main themes, quotes, and poems:

I began by reviewing the Buddha’s heart practices (Brahma Viharas, or ‘divine abodes’): loving-kindness, compassion, appreciative joy, and equanimity, which are states of heart and mind that reflect an ‘attitudinal commitment’ of friendliness and kindness to all beings and experiences. (Christina Feldman, ‘The Boundless Heart’). 

The Buddha said we should always live in one or more of these states, which are described as ‘boundless and immeasurable’ since there are no limits to how far they can extend or who can be included when we cultivate and deepen these states.

A helpful Buddhist teaching points to states that are the opposite of the four heart qualities—known as ‘far enemies’—and those that appear similar to the heart qualities but actually involve some form of clinging or separation—known as ‘near enemies.’ 

Far enemies of the heart practices are: 1) Loving-kindness: Far enemy—Hatred ; 2) Compassion: Far enemy—Cruelty; 3) Appreciative Joy (joy in another’s happiness): Far enemy—Envy; and 4) Equanimity: Far enemy—Aversion or clinging.  

Near enemies of these four qualities are: 1) Loving-kindness: Near enemy—Attachment ; 2) Compassion: Near enemy—Pity; 3) Appreciative Joy (joy in another’s happiness): Near enemy— Happiness tinged with attachment (e.g., to ‘my team’); and 4) Equanimity: Near enemy—Indifference.  

With each of the near enemies there is typically a resemblance to the genuine heart quality, but accompanied by an afflictive state of mind, like clinging, aversion, or judgment. So, indifference may appear like equanimity—e.g., remaining calm or unaffected amidst difficult conditions—but it incorporates distancing or separation from experience, or from the suffering of others. In the same way, pity may superficially appear like compassion, but involves separation, a sense of ‘above’ and ‘below’ or reaching down to another or others; and attachment may look like loving-kindness but incorporates an agenda of getting or expecting something.

The concept of ‘near enemies’ can be helpful in our practice in making us more aware when a genuine heart quality (e.g., loving-kindness, compassion, etc.) has shifted into a near enemy through lack of awareness or a habitual tendency of the mind—or where we think our intentions are wholesome but may contain a ‘sting in the tail’, for example, clinging or expecting something in return. 

I concluded with a personal story involving a gift I gave on retreat that I thought was motivated by loving-kindness and generosity, but came to see the giving contained a wish or expectation about outcome—and what this experience helped teach me about the near enemies of the four heart qualities. 

I shared a quote from Sri Nisargadatta, 20th century Indian spiritual teacher: ‘Wisdom tells me I’m nothing, Love tells me I’m everything. Between these two, my life flows’; poems, including ‘Small Kindnesses’ by Danusha Lameris; an excerpt from ‘There was a time I would reject those…’ by Muhyiddin Ibn Arabi; and some lines from ‘The Guest House’ by Rumi.

Wishing you a heart-opening week ahead. See you in two weeks, on Sunday, December 10 at 9am eastern for our next live session. Warmly, Hugh 🙏🏻 💜 🌻

What I Learned From My Dad - Thrive Global

What I Learned From My Dad - Thrive Global

“I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted and behold, service was joy.”

- Rabindrinath Tagore 

In the midst of winter…

In the midst of winter, I discovered within myself an invincible summer. ~ Albert Camus

Gratitude, Camus, joy, watering seeds of contentment

Hugh Byrne - May 22

Live Session Summary, Sunday, May 22, 2022: The theme of today’s Live session was ‘Two Kinds of Thought.’ I spoke about how certain kinds of thinking—such as complaining, blaming, judging, clinging, worrying, etc.—lead to suffering, while thoughts of compassion, gratitude, generosity, loving-kindness, joy, and peace lead to happiness and greater freedom. 

Each kind of thinking becomes a habit of mind, but the first kind keep us locked in an illusion of a separate self and in suffering, while the second kind becomes a wholesome and beneficial way of living. As the Buddha said, ‘What a person thinks about and frequently ponders on, that becomes their inclination of mind.’ It serves us, then, to abandon or let go of the unwholesome thoughts and cultivate beneficial ones. 

I quoted from a discourse of the Buddha called ‘Two Kinds of Thought’, which highlighted how the Buddha, before his enlightenment, divided his thoughts into these two classes or categories. As he meditated and reflected on thoughts of craving, aversion, and cruelty, he saw the affliction they caused to himself and others and abandoned them. With thoughts of letting go, kindness, and non-harming, he saw they didn’t lead to harm, but rather led to happiness and freedom. These latter thoughts should be cultivated. 

His practice of abandoning the unskillful thoughts and cultivating the wholesome ones created the conditions for his awakening. Abandoning longstanding habits of mind is not easy, so we need a clear intention, wise effort, attention, and kindness to see certain thoughts and the harm they cause—and let them go.

I discussed how we can bring greater awareness to the kinds of thinking that keep our mind entangled or hooked—and working with them in meditation and daily life, we can choose not to fuel this kind of thought and, when they arise, to let them go. And we can choose to develop and nurture thoughts and intentions of kindness, gratitude, compassion, joy, etc., that enhance our well-being and help us abandon the unskillful thoughts. For example, consciously cultivating gratitude can shift the mind away from thoughts of self-judgment, anger, craving, etc., allowing us to appreciate what we have rather than being fixated on what is ‘wrong’ or what we lack. 

Poems I shared today included ‘There was a time I would reject those…’ by Muhyiddin Ibn al-‘Arabi (this is included in ‘Poetry of Presence: An Anthology of Mindfulness Poems’, edited by Phyllis Cole-Dai and Ruby R. Wilson); and Mary Oliver’s ‘I Worried’.

Have a safe and joyful week—and see you next Sunday, May 29, at 9am eastern. I’ll be teaching a workshop at Kripalu in Massachusetts and the session will be a little shorter this week. Warmly, Hugh 🙏🏼 🌻

Poem: am i not among the early risers? by Mary Oliver | Blue Rock Farm

Poem: am i not among the early risers? by Mary Oliver | Blue Rock Farm

Am I not among the early risers
and the long-distance walkers?

Have I not stood, amazed, as I consider
the perfection of the morning star
above the peaks of the houses, and the crowns of the trees
blue in the first light?
Do I not see how the trees tremble, as though
sheets of water flowed over them
though it is only wind, that common thing,
free to everyone, and everything?

Have I not thought, for years, what it would be
worthy to do, and then gone off, barefoot and with a silver pail,
to gather blueberries,
thus coming, as I think, upon a right answer?

What will ambition do for me that the fox, appearing suddenly
at the top of the field,
her eyes sharp and confident as she stared into mine,
has not already done?

What countries, what visitations,
what pomp
would satisfy me as thoroughly as Blackwater Woods
on a sun-filled morning, or, equally, in the rain?

Here is an amazement–––once I was twenty years old and in
every motion of my body there was a delicious ease,
and in every motion of the green earth there was
a hint of paradise,
and now I am sixty years old, and it is the same.

Above the modest house and the palace–––the same darkness.
Above the evil man and the just, the same stars.
Above the child who will recover and the child who will
not recover, the same energies roll forward,
from one tragedy to the next and from one foolishness to the next.

I bow down.

Have I not loved as though the beloved could vanish at any moment,
or become preoccupied, or whisper a name other than mine
in the stretched curvatures of lust, or over the dinner table?
Have I ever taken good fortune for granted?

Have I not, every spring, befriended the swarm that pours forth?
Have I not summoned the honey-man to come, to hurry,
to bring with him the white and comfortable hive?

And while I waited, have I not leaned close, to see everything?
Have I not been stung as I watched their milling and gleaming,
and stung hard?

Have I not been ready always at the iron door,
not knowing to what country it opens–––to death or to more life?

Have I ever said that the day was too hot or too cold
or the night too long and as black as oil anyway,
or the morning, washed blue and emptied entirely
of the second-rate, less than happiness

as I stepped down from the porch and set out along
the green paths of the world?

C. Dale Young on Jack Gilbert’s “A Brief for the Defense”

C. Dale Young on Jack Gilbert’s “A Brief for the Defense”

A Brief for the Defense

Sorrow everywhere. Slaughter everywhere. If babies
are not starving someplace, they are starving
somewhere else. With flies in their nostrils.
But we enjoy our lives because that's what God wants.
Otherwise the mornings before summer dawn would not
be made so fine. The Bengal tiger would not
be fashioned so miraculously well. The poor women
at the fountain are laughing together between
the suffering they have known and the awfulness
in their future, smiling and laughing while somebody
in the village is very sick. There is laughter
every day in the terrible streets of Calcutta,
and the women laugh in the cages of Bombay.
If we deny our happiness, resist our satisfaction,
we lessen the importance of their deprivation.
We must risk delight. We can do without pleasure,
but not delight. Not enjoyment. We must have
the stubbornness to accept our gladness in the ruthless
furnace of this world. To make injustice the only
measure of our attention is to praise the Devil.
If the locomotive of the Lord runs us down,
we should give thanks that the end had magnitude.
We must admit there will be music despite everything.
We stand at the prow again of a small ship
anchored late at night in the tiny port
looking over to the sleeping island: the waterfront
is three shuttered cafés and one naked light burning.
To hear the faint sound of oars in the silence as a rowboat
comes slowly out and then goes back is truly worth
all the years of sorrow that are to come.

From Collected Poems by Jack Gilbert. Copyright © 2012 by Jack Gilbert. Reprinted with the permission of Alfred A. Knopf, a division of Penguin Random House LLC. Reprinted with the permission of the publisher.  

---

And day after day, as I hear the panic and fears of my patients, friends, others, my mind keeps turning to a specific poem. As San Francisco went to "shelter-in-place" and the city started shutting down, people began to feel as if the world had slowed almost to a stop. We could no longer go to restaurants, cafes, bars, sporting events. And Jack Gilbert's poem kept surfacing from deep inside me. Every news item mentioned the virus, and I kept hearing Jack Gilbert. This poem, "A Brief for the Defense," is complicated and not always loved by people, but in it I hear a call for resistance in the face of overwhelming sadness and despair. I come back, again and again, to these lines: "We must risk delight. We can do without pleasure, / but not delight. Not enjoyment. We must have / the stubbornness to accept our gladness in the ruthless / furnace of this world."

---

In response to the Coronavirus pandemic, we asked poets to write about the poems they return to in difficult times—to find solace, perspective, or even a moment of delight. Subscribe to the PSA newsletter for more Reading In The Dark responses and to keep updated with the PSA.

A basic truth of my life is that I am a poet and a physician. But as with all truths, those two roles are not equal, nor are they often seen equally. I spend the vast majority of my days being a doctor. I can assure you the vast number of people who encounter me in my day-to-day life have no idea whatsoever I am a poet. For the past three weeks, the medical staff and the entire team at my hospital have been dealing with the coronavirus issue. Do we cancel elective cases? Do we screen? Every single day, the information has changed and we have had to adapt. Many of us in healthcare are already so tired because every day we are managing people's panic and fear.

—C. DALE YOUNG

​C. Dale Young practices medicine full-time and teaches in the Warren Wilson College MFA Program for Writers. He is the author of a novel in stories, The Affliction, and four collections of poetry​.

Offered by Hugh Byrne on Sunday, Mar 20, 2022 via Insighttimer app

On Quiet Joy ...Danna Faulds

Here is a poem on joy that I just came across. Can’t resist sharing 😊 

I am filled with quiet

joy for no reason save

the fact that I’m alive.

The message I receive

is clear – there’s no time

to lose from loving, no

place but here to offer

kindness, no day but this

to be my true, unfettered

self and pass the flame

from heart to heart. This

is the only moment that

exists – so simple, so

exquisite, and so real.

~ Danna Faulds

Life as Dancing - 'Birdwings' by Rumi

 

Birdwings

Your grief for what you’ve lost lifts a mirror
up to where you’re bravely working.

Expecting the worst, you look, and instead,
here’s the joyful face you’ve been wanting to see

Your hand opens and closes and opens and closes.
If it were always fist or always stretched open, you would be paralyzed.

Your deepest presence is in every small contracting and expanding.
the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated
as bird wings.

~ Rumi

Mind Wanting More - Holly Hughes

 

Mind Wanting More

BY HOLLY J. HUGHES

Only a beige slat of sun

above the horizon, like a shade

pulled not quite down. Otherwise,

clouds. Sea rippled here and

there. Birds reluctant to fly.

The mind wants a shaft of sun to

stir the grey porridge of clouds,

an osprey to stitch sea to sky

with its barred wings, some dramatic

music: a symphony, perhaps

a Chinese gong.

 

But the mind always

wants more than it has—

one more bright day of sun,

one more clear night in bed

with the moon; one more hour

to get the words right; one

more chance for the heart in hiding

to emerge from its thicket

in dried grasses—as if this quiet day

with its tentative light weren't enough,

as if joy weren't strewn all around.

Poem copyright ©2004 by Holly J. Hughes, "Mind Wanting More," from Poetry of Presence: An Anthology of Mindfulness Poems (Grayson Books, 2017). Poem reprinted by permission of Holly J. Hughes and the publisher.

Service to others is the rent you pa...

Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on earth. ~ Muhammad Ali

[the snow is melting]

BY KOBAYASHI ISSA

TRANSLATED BY ROBERT HASS

The snow is melting

and the village is flooded

      with children.

I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted and behold, service was joy. ~ Rabindranath Tagore

The root of joy is gratefulness It is not joy that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us joyful. ~ Brother David Steindl-Rast

Seize from every moment its unique novelty and do not prepare your joys. ~ Andre Gide

Lighten up

Joy Has Many Flavors

Joy has many different flavors. It might overflow from us in song or dance, or it might gently arise as a smile or a sense of inner fullness. Joy is not something we have to manufacture. It is already in us when we come into the world, as we can see in the natural delight and exuberance of a healthy baby. We need only release the layers of contraction and fear that keep us from it.

The Dharma Gate of Joy and Ease

from the Dharma Gate of Joy and Ease by Enkyo Roshi

Reply by Heedful. Absorbed in Jhana. An Abundance of Ease. on February 13, 2011, 6:07 am

Hello David

Your analogy of the forcefulness of some thoughts is a good one. Some thoughts have little power in the mind and others seem to take over the mind. Here are a few approaches which I have found to be helpful for all kinds of thought (drawn from the Anapanasati Sutta):

1. Whatever thought comes up which is a distaction from the concentration - be observant of it and then bring the attention back to the breath sensations in the body wherever you can comfortably stay with them - this may be thoughout the body or in a specific are such as the head, abdomen, base of the throat, hands etc. By repeated reapplication of ones attention to the in and out breath sensations some kinds of thought subside This is a fairly standard approach to breath meditation. By breath sensations I dont just mean the air coming in and out the lungs but any sense of energy, movement, sensation in the body - hence one can have a sense of the breath coming in and out of the hands or the entire body.

2. Whenever a distracting thought comes direct ones attention to breathing in an energising, refreshing breath or a calming relaxing breath. This advice here is of basicaly two kinds because it depends on the state and the body and mind at the time. When there is agitation then a calming breathing is good. When there is dullness then an energising breath is good. In order to do this effectively ones needs to be both observant and truthful about what is actually happening and to keep tabs on what the effects of how one is breathing is having on the body and mind.

3. When a distarcting thoughts arises then try to gauge the state of ones mind. Distracted outwardly, agitated, bored, indifferent, dull etc. One can then reflect on a theme that either calms or energises to bring the mind into balance. For instance one can reflect on the qualities of the Buddha, Dhamma, Sangha, or on the benefits of generosity, or any other inspiring theme until the mind becomes more steady.

4. When a distracting thought arises then see those thoughts as inconstant, stressful, not ones self. Basically the strategy here is to encourage the perception of being distant from those thoughts, that they dont belong to you, and are simply a process which is arising and which comes and goes. See the thoughts as fabrication - they arise based on a past and/or present cause. One can apply any of the three different kinds of perception inconstancy, stressfulness or not-self (not me, not mine, not my self).

These four approaches overlap as thier focus centres around the breath in its different aspects in regard to mind and body. The breath is always the main theme for ones mindfulness.
Undesirable thoughts dont just arise when sitting in meditation of course and one can just as usefully apply these strategies at other times too.

Best wishes.

You may also find the Buddha's teaching on the 'The Relaxation of Thoughts' to be useful:
http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.020.than.html