Summary of Live Session, February 27, 2022:
"It was good to be with everyone today and hold in our hearts and meditation the people of Ukraine at this extraordinarily difficult time. The theme of our session today was ‘Working Wisely and Kindly with Fear.’
I shared that while many people view fear and anger as ‘negative’ emotions, it is more helpful to see them as intelligent, survival-based emotions that allowed our ancestors to respond immediately to threats and be able to survive and pass on their genes. These emotions provide us with helpful information and continue to be necessary and useful to us today—particularly in situations of danger.
These emotions can get us into trouble when we do not respond to them with awareness and, particularly, when we create fear-based, future scenarios that may never happen, but keep us locked in a fight-or-flight reaction. I used the image of the Zen monk in a cave, who painted a tiger on the wall and was terrified every time he looked at the image of the tiger. We often paint pictures in our minds—sometimes catastrophizing—and then become activated and fearful when we think of the pictures or fears we’ve created ourselves. As Mark Twain reputedly said, ‘My life has been filled with terrible misfortunes, most of which never happened.’
So, when fear arises in the mind, rather than getting caught up in thoughts about what might happen, it is wise to stay grounded in our direct experience, particularly bodily feelings and sensations, and, meet them with kindness, letting them come and go.
Two keys to working with fear are, first, to meet fear with awareness—making space for whatever we’re experiencing, ‘welcoming the guests’—and letting the sensations, feelings, and emotions come and go without resistance or getting lost in thoughts and narratives about the situation.
The second essential way of working wisely with fear is to bring in the heart—to meet fear with loving-kindness and compassion, rather than with aversion and ‘fearing the fear.’ I shared the Buddhist legend of the origin of the practice of loving-kindness (metta)—of the Buddha giving his followers the practice of metta as an antidote to fear—and Sharon Salzberg’s reflection on the meaning of the story: that loving-kindness can penetrate and dislodge fear, but a heart filled with love and friendliness cannot be overtaken by fear.
The stories and poems I shared include:
• Rilke’s ‘Letters to a Young Poet’—where he invites his young friend to ‘always trust in the difficult’ and turn towards what we fear: ‘Perhaps all the dragons in our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us act, just once, with beauty and courage.’ And he adds, ‘Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love.’
• Wendell Berry’s poem ‘I go among trees’
• W.B. Yeats, “We can make our minds so like still water that beings gather about us that they may see, it may be, their own images, and so live for a moment with a clearer, perhaps even with a fiercer life because of our quiet.” (‘The Celtic Twilight: Faerie and Folklore’)
• Romain Rolland, ‘There is only one heroism in the world: to see the world as it is, and to love it.’
• Some of Rumi’s ‘The Guest House’, Martha Postlethwaite’s ‘Clearing’, and Mary Oliver’s ending to ‘The Summer Day’—‘Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life.’
Wishing you a safe and open-hearted week ahead. Let us hold the people of Ukraine in our hearts, prayers, and meditation—and do all that we can to support them in this hour of need. See you next Sunday at 9am eastern. Warmly, Hugh 🇺🇦💙 💛 🙏🏻
If it has terrors, they are our terrors -Rilke
~ Arrange our lives to always trust in the difficult.
~ the myths about dragons ...dragons are ultimately transformed into princes...acting with beauty and courage...opening to what is scary or difficult.
opening to whatever is scary...with courage, with kindness
Rilke on th emyth of dragons and transforming the scary into prince.
'this moment without judgment' ~ - Dorothy Hunt
may I be kind to myself....may I accept myself just as I am.
Perhaps everything that frightens us is helpless, wants our kindness ~ Rilke
Romain Roland https://www.azquotes.com/author/12563-Romain_Rolland
only one true heroism...to see the world as it is, and to love it.
https://whatsmyquote.com/quote/there-is-only-one-heroism-in-the-world-to-see-the-world-as-it-is-and-to-love-it/page/2
Wishing oneself well, to love the world, we must love ourselves first...lovingkindness and care towards self. Wishing this intention can plant the seeds of possibility... (include the people of Ukraine).
Kindness has no enemy...includes everyone. particularly today the people of Ukraine...even Putin himself.
This is 'unconditional' ...for all beings.
Wendell Berry - I go among trees...It sings and I hear its song."
